“My Creature is brave, fierce light.”
“At first, my gut response to the word ‘Creature’ was fear, and the second was protection. I feel protective of her because there have been times in my life when I was afraid to spend time together: recognizing and honoring her.
It’s not something I have allowed others to witness often. Usually, she comes out when no one expects it. It happens when I’m pushed to the edge, and all my inhibitions are dropped.
But she’s also the part of me I would go to if I needed a protector. If I needed something huge to be done. When amazing things happen, she’s the one who celebrates. When I have a moving experience in nature, like the time I saw my first whale, she’s the one who gets to come out, crying and laughing and screaming in pure joy.
So I need to respect her. And intentionally make time for her to play, which is something I’ve never done before.
Usually, forces beyond my control cause her to erupt and reveal herself. The rest of me tries to moderate all the time and keep everything appropriate. But the truth is, I’m a tornado.
My Creature feels like a fierce light. In enraptured moments of bliss and joy and fury and hope and hopelessness, I feel like I’m clearing away the responsible parts of myself and just letting her shoot out of me. It feels like I’m cracking open and she’s pushing herself out. She becomes too big to contain.
There’s no humility left. There’s no space to keep up a guard or a facade.
It’s so intense and potent and beautiful. And it’s so extreme.
Sometimes it feels like literally kissing the sun.
When I allow myself to step into the vulnerability and courage she needs in order to come out, suddenly she’s set free.
I want to continue learning how to love myself better all the time and develop a deeper relationship with my spirituality.
I’ve built so much trust with the people in my life who I can share that side with, who have witnessed my Creature in real life moments as they occurred. Having her documented now is simply a way to share that with a larger audience.
If you see her and you get it, join the movement. Show me your Creature.
Emily’s Creature was featured in this month’s photo exhibit at The Marketplace Cafe in Pittsfield, MA. Stop by, grab a coffee, and see some wild beauty!